Confidence is a tricky thing to describe. We often talk about it as though it is a physical thing. We describe how it can be knocked, by setbacks or rejection. Equally, we talk about how it can be given a boost, by success or achievement. But it isn’t a physical thing at all. In fact it’s one of the most intangible things there is. Sometimes it can feel like the more desperately we want to grab hold of some, the more difficult it is to do so.

Confidence fluctuates from situation to situation. That is why someone who might be very relaxed and confident in his solitary work as a mechanic might lack confidence going to a party where he has to make small-talk with people he doesn’t know. Or a teacher who is quite confident about standing up in front of a class of 30 school children starts to feel panicky at the prospect of a one-to-one meeting with the headmistress.

It also fluctuates over time. There may be times in our lives where we feel that things are generally going okay and for whatever reason our confidence in ourselves grows. There can be times though when it feels like events are conspiring against us and things keep going wrong. Our confidence can take a dip.

Confidence exists on a continuum and all of us will fall somewhere on that continuum. Though we might be naturally predisposed to having different starting points on that continuum, experiences in our lives can influence whether we move up the continuum towards greater confidence or downwards.

But we are not simply at the mercy of events that happen randomly in our lives. By the way in which we choose to live our lives, this also can determine whether we move upwards towards greater confidence, or not.

So anyone can improve their level of confidence. I plan to explain lots of ways of doing this. The first thing one has to accept though is that truly building confidence requires some effort. It might involve taking time to reflect on the way you are thinking and feeling about certain situations. It will almost certainly involve going into situations that previously you might have avoided. But one thing is guaranteed –  the more time and effort you put into building your confidence, the more you will get out.